on back fat, pancakes, and iphones.

13 Apr

I’ll start out by being up front about myself: in terms of my body, I am overweight. I’m not obese, but I’m not a stick, either. I have a pear shape, with what’s been called “child-bearin’ hips”, and a rather plump bottom. I don’t mind it so much most of the time, because I know that part of it is thyroid issues, and the other part is pure laziness. My weight has never been more than 180, and I never will let it get that high. Since I’ve got a triangle/pear shape, most of my weight is in my hips and thighs, and very little of it is in my chest or belly. As a matter of fact, I’m a bit flat-chested. Eh, not a big deal, I don’t really care that much about my chest.

Now, the reason I bring up my body is very simple: back fat. I may have a little bit, but it’s really not much. It’s tiny. Only noticeable if I’m wearing a bra that’s too tight in the band, and a near-transparent shirt. Like I said, not much. I know a girl, however, who is built a little like me, only she’s taller, and her weight actually starts in her belly. Unlike a lot of other women I know who at least suck it in a little, she lets it all hang out. She’s 18 (maybe 19), very opinionated, very full of herself, and really does think that wearing her mom’s clothes from Christopher and Banks (circa 1995) makes her look hot. It doesn’t.

This girl, who I’ll call JC, has a tendency to wear patterned broom skirts that sit at her waist and stop above her ankles, coupled with Birkenstocks, chipped and ugly toenail polish, plain t-shirts that are too tight around her arms and stomach but baggy in the chest area, her limp hair pulled into a ponytail, and her too-big glasses perched on a greasy nose. She’s the kind of girl who won’t use pictures of herself as her Facebook profile picture, since she’d rather use a picture of a half-naked anime girl. Her mom is her best friend, but not in that cute Gilmore Girls way, more in a creepy, “Mommy loves me so much! I’m going to be just like her when I’m old!” way that stops being adorable once you hit puberty.
The point is, she’s a bigger girl who is delusional enough to think that she’s really a 110-pound beauty queen in her 200-pound body. I had the unfortunate luck to see her for a couple of hours tonight. She was dressed in her mother’s clothes, again. The t-shirt she wore wasn’t too bad at first, though. It was that cute color of the year, Tangerine Tango, or something like it. That coral color that the world (and I) has fallen in love with. It complimented her skin tone, and she looked kind of decent for once. But then she turned around. And then I wanted to gag a little.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, her shirt was stuck in all of her back fat rolls. It was too tight in the back, and was stretched funny. Also, her bra was obviously a size too large, because she had that weird flat cup thing going on. The sad thing? She didn’t realize it. She was going on and on to someone else there about just how much she loved that shirt, that her mom had let her keep it, and oh my goodness, so many boys at the college today were looking at me when I walked by. Yes. Yes they were. Because you scared them.

I don’t even want to think about it anymore. Ew. Makes me not want to finish my pancakes. Ooh! Pancakes! I really do love them. Especially blueberry wheat pancakes. But alas, instead of those, I’m eating simple little plain pancakes from Denny’s.

Yes. That was just about pancakes.

Something on my mind tonight: iPhones. I don’t have one, although quite a few of my friends do. I have a Motorola Droid X, which I love. I’ve had it for about a year and a half, and it’s still in great shape, and I find new things to do with it almost every day. That being said, I am interested in the iPhone. I’m due for an upgrade at the end of the summer, and am considering getting an iPhone. I’d keep my droid, of course, if only as a backup, but the iPhone is a definite option. My other idea is to get the new Razr Maxx. Because the screen is huge. Yep, that’s probably going to be the deciding factor: screen size. The Droid X has a big screen, which comes in handy for those times when I want to watch old Angel episodes on Netflix while I’m playing Sims. Don’t judge.
 Another reason for an iPhone: TARDIS phone cover.

– D

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